Why God invented brooms

When you are trying to close the bar and there is still a guy in the bathroom passed out shitting and puking into his pants. When he finally got up he had apparently pissed himself as well making it extremely hard to get a taxi to take him.


Miss TDT 2016: Daniela Baptista

Congratulations, Daniela Baptista, for being the first South American to ever grace the august pages of TheDanzaTap.


Just like their American counterparts, cabelleros back in her home country are champing at the bit to have at Daniela’s juggos.


Though customary in Quito to waive such formalities, TDT took great pains to confirm that Daniela’s ass checks out – and it do.


Rumors abound about Daniela having some wild times in her abuela’s high rise.


Hopefully she is not engaged to Ricky Martin. Can’t have that.


Still don’t know a fucking song this guy sings

Kanye West, the Kardashians … a slippery slope. You start talking about them a little bit, soon you start talking about a lot of bit, then you take interest in what they do – next thing you know you’re sending a get well card to a giant negus who had a heart attack after a three day party in a whore house. Care must be taken.

So we held our tongues when KW begged Mark Zuckerberg for $53 million, sat on our thumbs when Kanye’s girl said he craves fingers up his ass (the jury has reached a verdict, btw – 100% certified mo) … but the lure is too great.

Here is what this asshole sounds like when there is no camera around…