Bag your own cougar

Cougars. Milfs. Snatcho. It’s all there for the taking on Instagram’s @smokinmommas account.

Consult TDT’s user guide so we can make the proper introductions.

Beginner – Jannie is new to the dating scene, no thousand yard stare. You both fumble around, hopefully at least one of you gets it right.

Intermediate – Jordan loves to get freaky. You might learn a thing or two without anyone knowing you’ve fully dipped your dong into the swinger’s lane.

Advanced – Destiny needs a guy ASAP. Fuck this up and it’s straight into the abyss you go.

Expert Only You are in the kitchen with Dinah. You are gonna eat.

Please remember that TheDanzaTap will not be held responsible for damages incurred should any cad misrepresent his expertise level.

Good luck!

Betting the chalk

Of interest: Tonight’s game in LA, Kershaw vs. the Braves is the most lopsided baseball line in 20 years.

TDT hero Michael Jack Corbin is risking $20k to win $5k.

Bottom of the 2nd, no score. Every dog has its day – maybe Atlanta’s Bud Norris rises to the occasion. Cross your fingers…

No loafing: Meat on Friday

Those crazy nights, I do remember at Hooters in Boca Raton
I do recall, those were the best times, most of all

– Steve Perry, of Journey
Original lyrics to “Stone in Love”, later changed by cold-hearted record exec.


Happy Meal



New York Strip
Processed with VSCO with t1 preset


Pan Seared Tuna

Ice Cream

Bon appetite los animales!

Two buck Chuck

Honoring today’s hero: Veteran Legal Aid Society’s Steven Pokart

Petty thief/longtime clown Aitabdel Salem spent 5 months locked up when a $2 bail would have freed him.

• Knowing what we do about the behavior of common street nuisances, Aitabdel must have been being a massive douche for his (free) lawyer to omit the mention that his guy could walk for less than it costs for a Starbucks coffee.

• The $2 bail was actually a combined sum for $1 bails on two different incidents. Maybe something is wrong with that picture.

• It would only be fair for Steven Pokart to remunerate Mr. Salem no less than two dollars.