Prisoner swap

Breaking news: TheDanzaTap has brokered a deal via trusted Spaniard connections.

We will send South America notorious green-haired swimmer Ronnie Chotchke…


… in exchange for this Pampas-area lass who stole our hearts and now must face a few reports of justice.


This is big.

Sources say she told a van full of gentlemen that she would meet them later that night at a respectable establishment – only to not show up.

Aghast at her antics, the chaps thought they were headed for a Starbucks to regroup – but somehow got stuck in evil Wesley’s booby trap. A few remaining stragglers did manage to reach a safe haven for men, but once there tragically caught AIDS from a toilet seat.

This one needs to pay.