Why liberated gals should think twice about befriending gay men
Always beware the "chill" ones.
From Craigslist:
OK, so I had my friend Jerry over for some pre beers prior to going out Saturday night. He brought 
over his friend Bob who was really chill and down to earth. After a few rounds Bob got a phone call and asked if he could use my bedroom for some privacy. I absolutely had no problem with that and let him go for it. After about 25 minutes he returned with a bright red face and a little uncomfortable disheveled way. We asked if everything was cool and he said "yeah, just a really intense conversation with an ex!" OK. We all went out and had a great time. The next morning I woke up and noticed my "goodies" drawer cracked open. I looked inside and noticed that everything was out of place especially my DILDO! 
I am super Anal about the cleanliness of "Mr Big" so I smelt it and OMG... It smelt like ASS! DID YOU BOB, USE MY DILDO, IN YOUR ASS? I am absolutely disgusted with this situation and now have to go find myself another dildo. I do not know what to do about confronting you, so I am hoping you read this!"
You just know Mr. Big was dying for some strange ... and then Bob comes along to provide a little sweet taste of mangina.
Next thing Mr. Big knows is that ol' tuna can who's been abusing him all these years has the gall to say he stinks! And then throws him in the garbage!
Ain't easy being a dildo.
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You’re dead-on, Admin. It ain’t easy being a dildo. Just ask Sean Penn.
Good one Ricky! Butt Bob, Relax, all right? My old man is a television repairman, he’s got this ultimate set of tools. I can fix it. or…Aloha, Mr. Hand.
I suspect we all knew that was from San Fran before even clicking on the actual posting. Hellllo friscccoo….
She herself said she was “super anal” about her dildo. Bad karma on her part methinks…
smelling the dildo, c’mon what’s the matter wif you. we all know you licked it and it tasted like ass.
I smelled them all before making my selection. Mr. Big was the one that smelled like ass. The rest smelled like a cat box.
aaaahahahahahahahaha! the ole brown-eye!
Fucking hillarious…laughed out loud!
Fags are just like bitches…. all up tight. Can’t share a dildo, come on you sissy. Can’t tell you how many times I shared a buddies girl.
And to the women: Who gives a shit where my dick has been, just be thankful I am letting you enjoy it right now.
Serves her right for inviting a horny ass cracker into her place
I don’t know what’s funnier this story or a “darkholer’s” take on chicks on who are super anal about their dildos.
Crack is whack.
smelled like an outhouse door on a tuna boat
I’ve done it to people’s toothbrushes, but doing it to their dildo is just poor form.
all homos will hang some day
It also ain’t easy being nicknamed “Mr. Big.” I’ve had to deal with it since I was 13…
Typical chick thing to do, too: “I do not know what to do about confronting you, so I’m hoping you read this.”
I hate when people shove my dildo in there ass.
I wonder if he left any ass crumbs on the bed spread.
Hope it wasn’t a white bed cover.
Haitian Homo Relief is looking for shit smelling Mr. Bigs. There is a desperate need on the island.
She should invite him over again after she has doused the 12 inch black thing in Tabasco.
Unacceptable.
WTF is wrong with people these days!!?? I ALWAYS ask my buddies if its ok to use their dildo before I cram it in my ass.
I must’ve missed it, but where does it say this post was from a girl?
The Sex and the City reference with Mr. Big. I think that proves it’s a girl. I don’t even think gay guys watch that crap.
“My friend Jerry” in truth refers to:
1) recently resigned Congressman Eric Massa
2) asinine Congressman Barney Frank
3) comedian Jerry Seinfeld…..not that there’s anything wrong with that!
The only thing ruder would have been to have taken a bite out of every single item in the fruit bowl before replacing it so that the bite can’t be seen. Which I have never done. Ever.