Pardon me sir, but there’s a chick in your chimney

October 21st, 2014

joyce1

So the way we date might have changed over the years, but thank goodness LA still has neighbors like Robert.

Where the company’s hers, and furs, and his…

larry_dallas

three’s company too.

Monday morning ride: Patching in

October 20th, 2014

Negotiation. Brinksmanship. Everyone is desperate to survive, hungry for power, and looking to save face.

I just had a sit down with The Pagans. They’re looking to patch-in with TheDanzaTap – we’re all gearing up for a final showdown with the Angels.

Honda
honda1

But the Pagans caught me off-guard when they asked what kind of motorcycles we ride. Fuck, I don’t even have a helmet.

Panicking now, I had to buy time: “I heard you guys are a bunch of homos. That true?”

That led to a little scuffle – some punches were thrown – but cooler heads prevailed. And we agreed to pick up the talks in a couple of days.

But now it’s time to buy our bikes. We must choose wisely.

Ducati

Tough guinea ride

Tough guinea ride

Suzuki

Known for hugging the curves

Great for hugging the curves

Harley-Davidson

American classic

American classic

Scooter

Urban, urbane, efficient

Urban, urbane, efficient

Custom

We ride at five

We ride at five

Sweet science beat: 3 ways to a new you

October 19th, 2014

1) Respect your elders

2) Clip that pony tail

3) Take a fucking report

The grapefruit technique

October 17th, 2014

If you don’t have a girlfriend handy, try your local grocer.

Invoice: Friday’s meat surplus

October 17th, 2014

Soup is on.

Crab Legs
kra1

Bowtie Shramp
kra2

Thick Cut Bacon
kra3

Knockwurst
kra4

Chicken Divan
kra5

Prime Rib
kra6

Porterhouse
kra7

Filet
kra8

Double Dipped Jimmie Cone
kra9

Bon appetite los animales!