FOK: The Jäger Whöre

October 21st, 2014

Fill or kill.


Chase her with a side of Bourbon?


Pardon me sir, but there’s a chick in your chimney

October 21st, 2014


So the way we date might have changed over the years, but thank goodness LA still has neighbors like Robert.

Where the company’s hers, and furs, and his…


three’s company too.

Monday morning ride: Patching in

October 20th, 2014

Negotiation. Brinksmanship. Everyone is desperate to survive, hungry for power, and looking to save face.

I just had a sit down with The Pagans. They’re looking to patch-in with TheDanzaTap – we’re all gearing up for a final showdown with the Angels.


But the Pagans caught me off-guard when they asked what kind of motorcycles we ride. Fuck, I don’t even have a helmet.

Panicking now, I had to buy time: “I heard you guys are a bunch of homos. That true?”

That led to a little scuffle – some punches were thrown – but cooler heads prevailed. And we agreed to pick up the talks in a couple of days.

But now it’s time to buy our bikes. We must choose wisely.


Tough guinea ride

Tough guinea ride


Known for hugging the curves

Great for hugging the curves


American classic

American classic


Urban, urbane, efficient

Urban, urbane, efficient


We ride at five

We ride at five

Sweet science beat: 3 ways to a new you

October 19th, 2014

1) Respect your elders

2) Clip that pony tail

3) Take a fucking report

The grapefruit technique

October 17th, 2014

If you don’t have a girlfriend handy, try your local grocer.